Sleep is for Amateurs...

I've never been much of a sleeper. Some people can start to think about something, and allowing their mind drift, quickly fall asleep. Not me. I start to think about something then my brain gets too busy and keeps me awake. It usually takes me a good 45 minutes to fall asleep and when I do it is never for more than 4 hours at a time. I never sleep well the first night in a strange place and if I'm only staying in that place for one night? Fuhgeddaboudit. If I *do* manage to get a full 8 hours, it's never uninterrupted. Ever.

When I was little we lived in a small white house with a huge yard. We owned the lot next to us. I think at one time it was my parents dream to build on to the house. That never happened. Instead we ended up moving into a house that my Grandpa Leo built. They had moved down the street into a smaller home and we moved into their house. It's the house I spent my H.S. years in. The house we lived in prior to that is the one that holds happy memories. Well, mostly happy.

My two sisters and I shared the upstairs of the house. There weren't definitive rooms. Instead there was an alcove that my older sister used as her room and it was separated by a couple of sheer curtains. Then there was an open space with a wicker table and chairs and a long bookcase that served as a divider to the space that my younger sister and I shared. Our beds sat parallel to each other. They were meant to be bunk beds but the room had an A-frame ceiling and was too low to set them up that way.

My favorite part of the "room" was the window seat across from the foot of the bed. It had a light blue pleather cover and the window opened to a slanted roof where we would go out and sit sometimes at night. Well my sister Theresa, or T as we call her, would go out and sit. Most of the time I'd just swing my legs out the window. Heights and I aren't friends.

It seemed to me that we had an early bedtime in the summer because I remember it always being still light outside and it would drive me crazy, because if it was light outside then there was still time to do stuff outside. We would never go to sleep when we were supposed to. Instead we often times would play "sock baseball". We'd roll up socks and one of us would pitch and the other would whack it across the room with their hand. That was my favorite indoor game. Even at a young age, I was afraid that if I fell asleep I'd miss something good. lol

I didn't know it then but, those years trained me to be able to take care of my babies. Especially my son. When we arrived home from the hospital, I had no strength. I was exhausted and felt very alone. It was a happy time, for me and my son. But, I had no help. Oh his Father was there, annnnnd that's about it. My days were long and my nights were even longer. My son refused to sleep in a crib. The only way he'd fall asleep was was by laying on his belly against my chest. So most nights I'd just lay awake and listen to him breath while I sat propped up on pillows. His Father was impossible to wake up. If someone were ever to have broken in, it would be up to me to defend us. Not joking.

I tweeted the other day to Joe Mac. The guys had a couple of days off for the 4th and he had gone home to his wife and kids. Spent his first night with their new baby girl. I applaud him. As tired as all the guys are from this tour he still took care of his daughter. So when I said, " Hard working Dad,a job to get back to, and still takes care of his wife by taking care his child. Men like that aren't a myth?" I meant it. In my world, they are. Nothing is sexier to me than a guy who is so amazing to their kids. Even sexier is watching a man who is amazing to kids that are not his own but belong to the woman that he loves. My bestie has that now and I am thankful she has him. My friend Sherri has found an amazing man like that and will solidify their family soon.

Mel asked me not that long ago why is it I can't sleep and have I always been that way? My answer was that I've always been that way, but really started the day my son was born. Drives her crazy though because not only am I a night owl, I'm also a morning person. I don't wake up grumpy. Even if I have a migraine. And once I'm awake, I'm up. I can't go back to sleep. It sucks during those rare moments when a miracle occurs and I sleep straight through a whole 6 hours. It's like an eclipse. The last time that happened? January. Mel and I were in NYC for a week. If she wasn't there to have witnessed it, I don't think anyone would've have believed me. 

When we were on the NKOTB cruise, this past past May, there were deck parties every night and after that we would go and have ice cream at 4A.M. with our friend Roxi. We would get passing comments throughout the day, such as "I can't believe you two were STILL dancing. You closed it out every night. Did you even sleep." First of all, get me on a dance floor and you're gonna have to pry me off of it. Unless the DJ sucks. *raising eyebrow* lol I'll stay, but I just might not dance as much.

Little did I know then, that had I not stayed up all those nights as a child, I would not have had the stamina to stay awake with my son, nor the stamina to have the schedule I did all winter, and I definitely wouldn't have the stamina to go all night on a deck, on a boat, in the middle of the ocean for four nights straight. Of course it helps when you love who you go all night with. When you have that, the time goes by way too fast. ;)

So I call those early years of my life "training". I'm "pro" now baby! lol I smile at those nights as a kid sitting on my window seat, and playing "sock baseball" with my kid sister. I was right you know.......if I go to sleep......I'll  miss something good. :)