Until....

I haven't been feeling very Bloggy as of late. Stress has been on the menu for the last week or so. Coupled with PMS and well....not even french fries and a big ass Coke with extra ice, helped. Been a bit emo tonight and when my bestie asked me what was up, the conversation just went like this...

Mel: Why so emo Sugartush?

Me: Lonely.

Mel: *sigh* I'm sorry.

Me: *shrug* Is what it is.

Mel: Maybe you need to get back on the dating train. You don't have to marry anybody, but it couldn't hurt to try and go on a date.

Me: No thank you.

Mel: If you're lonely, why wouldn't you try to do something to fix that?

Me: Because boys are dumb. And I'm lonely in this moment. It will pass. Plus....I refuse to lower my standards. Also....I'm not a dater.

Mel: lol....okay...explain the "not a dater" part.

Me: I'm a relationship girl. I don't casually date. *shrug* I just don't. I'm not built that way.

Mel: ok. Understandable, but how do you get to the relationship without dating him?

Me: Let me clarify.....I won't date just anyone. It takes A LOT for me to go out with someone. A LOT.

Mel: I understand that, too. Just saying, nothing wrong with going out on a date with somebody. It's not marriage. It's a movie and dinner. I won't push. It's your call. It was just a suggestion. :)

Me: Thank you.

Mel: I just hate seeing you lonely. And you know me...I'm a fixer.

Me: Okay....you find me the all american boy next door who looks like Josh Duhamel and can dance and I'll go on a date. lol

Mel *tweets*: HA! Like that's a challenge. A real challenge is forty minutes with Google earth. This? Piece. Of. Cake.

Me: Please tell me you aren't referring to my last message.

Mel: That's EXACTLY what I was referring to.

Me: Okay...then I HAVE to add I will NOT go on a blind date.

Mel: Too bad. You already set your criteria. You can't change it now.

Me: The HELL I can't. Good luck with that kid.

Mel: So the guy has to randomly wander into your life?

Me: No...I didn't say that. Although that would be the best way. I said I won't go on a blind date. Might I remind you that your taste in men and my taste in men are vastly different. Who *you* may perceive to look like Josh Duhamel, *I* may think looks more like Gargamel.

Mel: Point taken. Insulted of course, but point taken.

Me: Stop. You know what I mean. I don't think the guys you are interested in look like Gargamel. Please don't take it that way.

Mel: Honey, who's your bouncer? Who helped you lay the foundation for NEVER settling again? Gimme some credit.

Me: This is true. I apologize.

Mel: Thank you. I forgive you.

Dear God in heaven help me if my bestie is in fact on a mission. She's a fixer. However, I'm not exactly of the mindset that "Until Mr. Right comes along there's always Mr. Right Now." I can't do it. I have never been and never will be that girl. The process of "finding myself" again  has not changed that. I'm not a rebound chick. I got divorced almost a year ago. Separated long before that.....more than once. I can count on one hand how many guys I've dated in my entire life.

The sad part of it all, is every guy I meet will not hold a candle to the one I already want. Yeah, I know, that's not fair to whomever is out there, but it's the truth. *shrug* And it will remain that way until...well....until it doesn't.